Red, Blue & Bestie Too: Can Friendships Survive Politics?

0:00 Jennifer: Hey there, I'm Jennifer. And I'm Jackie. And welcome to Slightly Unsupervised. We're best friends, business partners, and the chaos behind Bestimony, a ceremony we created to celebrate the kind of soulmates who don't come with a marital essence.

0:10 Jackie: This podcast is all about that friendship energy, the deep stuff, the messy stuff, and the laugh to use snort stuff.

0:16 Jennifer: So whether you're driving, folding laundry, or hiding in your car for some peace and quiet, you're in good company.

0:20 Jackie: Let's get slightly unsupervised. All right, today we're going to talk about something that's on everybody's mind for sure. You love her, but you're you're you're on opposite sides of the ballot. In this episode of Slightly Unsupervised, me and Jen take on one of the most emotionally charged topics in friendship: politics. Can two besties still laugh, love, and support each other when their worldviews are totally different? What happens when beliefs cross over into identity? And silence starts to be feel like betrayal.

0:50 Jackie: Because sometimes a friendship isn't what changes, it's the world around it that does.

0:55 Jennifer: Yeah, so this one's supercharged, and we didn't we said we've talked about talking about it because it's definitely something that uh tears people apart, but we haven't.

1:05 Jackie: And it's another reason we weren't sure if we were going to talk about it.

1:09 Jennifer: Right. Right. Because politics have become the new thing to disown everybody in your life about. I just want to start out by saying this that we come from an era of we didn't. I can promise you this. Up to about maybe 10 years ago, I had no idea who who was what. I didn't know if you what political view you had. I don't know what my friend's political views were. I don't think we cared. It didn't affect our lives. It wasn't we used to be in the middle, which was middle politics, meaning like we changed a little bit both ways, but we never wiggled around too much.

1:45 Jennifer: Politics have become extreme. There is the far left and there is the far right. We all used to be sort of in the middle and we sort of lived more in a peaceful place and what your politics view were nice, but isn't really something we talked about. And now it's like the number one thing to talk about and to disagree about. And from just the standpoint of someone who's been watching this unfold in the world of friendships, it's a sad thing to see because politics are so extreme. If you don't agree with somebody's extreme views, you can be set aside and you could lose a friendship of a lot of years because of that.

2:24 Jennifer: And 10 years ago, you wouldn't even have known it. It wasn't radical like this. Like that's the radicalness of politics that has changed. The politics have changed so drastically. The friendships haven't changed, the politics have, and all of a sudden everybody's charged up about everything. Um I know that I have witnessed friends that have lost each other because of their political views when they were really good friends. How does that happen? How do you go from somebody who was really once you're in tune with you and you loved and was somebody you treasured their friendship and their who they were as a person?

3:01 Jennifer: How can it change so drastically because their politics don't align with you? I I don't get it. Do you? I mean, I I it's a very hard concept for me to understand because how could a 10 years ago didn't matter and now all of a sudden it's the biggest and most threatening thing happening to friendships.

3:18 Jackie: Yeah. You're afraid to talk about it. And like we said, when we were brought up, it was you did not talk about politics, you did not talk about finances, and you didn't talk about religion.

3:28 Jennifer: Right.

3:28 Jackie: And that's, you know, so now when we do start talking about it, that's why we're so surprised if someone gets angry with us and doesn't want to be our friend anymore. Right. Because we're like, wait, we used to talk about this years ago, and that was never a problem. Right. Why now is like all of a sudden you can just see their faces turn red. And like, if you don't believe what I believe, then you're not my friend. How could you believe that? I had somebody one time, all I did was take a picture with a Donald Trump, someone had a Donald Trump, you know, standing thing in his restaurant.

3:56 Jackie: Right. And I just did a little thumb next to it. I got a letter from this girl that was actually one of my daughter's friends, that she just went off. I mean, it was like we were went to bed and it was like beep, beep, but you keep hearing it. And finally I'm like, maybe there's an emergency. And I checked it. She was going off on me because I took a picture with the standing trump with my thumb up.

4:15 Jennifer: Right.

4:16 Jackie: And she didn't want to ever talk to me again. Like straight. I'm like, that was a joke. That was not meant to be anything. I didn't sit there and say, oh yeah, number one. I was just doing a joke with a cutout. Like, come on. So at that point, I'm like, you know what? I'm sorry. I I don't know how to there was like no apologies to her. She did not care. I just blocked her. I'm like, I just don't need her to keep beeping my phone. Right. And it was sad. It was just, it was just the weirdest thing ever.

4:43 Jackie: But yeah, that's never happened before.

4:45 Jennifer: I think that, you know, we I sound on one side and you sound on one side. I never used to stand that strong on that side, right? I think I got shoved over there. And because I got torn apart for believing something in such a disrespectful way that wasn't a conversation, but a judgment on me as a human being. All of a sudden I started getting into a protective position on my stance on politics that I would have just said, I don't know, somewhere in between. I don't really care. Like, as long as it doesn't radically change, it doesn't really bother me.

5:18 Jennifer: But now all of a sudden I'm like, oh yeah, well, what about on your side? Like, I my stance has changed because I have been pushed and I have been just like you were for doing anything, you get in trouble for it. All of a sudden, you at some point stop being nice about it and you're just like, you want to swing? I'll swing back. And I think that happens all the time in politics. And, you know, we're just beating each other up. And you've got to understand, like, I don't understand where that came from because this was never a thing before.

5:48 Jennifer: If you are new into politics and you're growing up and this is something that you're watching and you're like, for all these years, you know, you could disagree with some like we were never on the same page with anybody because nobody ever knew the page. There was no page, it was just the middle of the road. Like we kind of change a little bit one way or kind of change a little bit the other way, but it was never radical. It's radical that's what's changed.

6:10 Jackie: And our family is split with with our children. And we have two boys, two girls, and they're they're on either side. And my husband, when the kids were growing up, we would sit at the table at night. We did dinner when everybody was there. We had it to sit down. And we would talk about, but he never went on who or what he believed in. But he questioned the kids on it. Right. Be like, okay, either side, either way, too. Why do you feel that way? You know, to see if it's is it the school that's making you think this way?

6:35 Jackie: Is it your friend, you know, what can you think for yourself?

6:38 Jennifer: Right.

6:38 Jackie: And see, so we're we all get along perfectly. We just we don't talk about the politics. Right. Because it goes because my husband's one way and you know, some are the other, and some are with I get with my husband. But yeah, it's it's it's just really bad. I'm just like, I can't believe we're talking about this because I just yeah. Yeah. It is bad. I mean, you have families, you have people with mu you know, people that are older that are split, husbands and wives now that fight over this.

7:04 Jennifer: They'll get divorced.

7:05 Jackie: I mean, come on.

7:07 Jennifer: Perpetuate it when you feed it, when you get involved and you start fighting and screaming and yelling and doing what it is that tears everybody apart, you're part of the problem. I'm sorry, you are. I keep my mouth shut on a lot of stuff because I'm like, I'm not gonna contribute to the demise of relationships and the demise of families and the demise of human. I mean, there's parents and children that are divided that won't speak to each other. And what is going on here? We have really lost our freaking minds.

7:34 Jennifer: I mean, how ridiculous could this get to? And it's like, it's there's no stop. And not, I'm gonna say it 100%. I'll believe it. You know I'm gonna say it if I believe it. Each side is at fault. Each side. Each side does the same shit. And they fight and the other one fights, and the other one fights, and the other one fights, and no side is better than the other. Period. End of discussion. Nobody gets to sit out of this and be like, I've really tried to make peace. You can't scream peace and fight.

8:01 Jennifer: I have a friend that did this with her child, and this is it stands in my mind, and I'm gonna share it with everybody because I think it's true. She was, she had her kids and one son hit the other son. And she went over to him and she raised her hand and she smacked his um, she smacked his hand. She goes, we do not hit, as she smacked his hand, right? And then she said, I stopped there for a minute and I was thinking, what am I doing? I'm hitting my son on his hand for hitting his brother, telling him that we don't do that.

8:32 Jennifer: And yet that's what I'm doing. And I think that's hypocrisy, right? That's when you are perpetuating the thing that you're saying against by creating all this sort of animosity and unpeace and unwellness, and everybody's fighting and everybody's upset with each other, and you're contributing to it, and then you're telling everybody that, you know, what we need is world peace. That's not world peace. We can't even, we can't begin with world peace when we can't have peace and harmony in our own families, or we can't have peace and harmony in our own relationships with our friends, or we can have peace and harmony when we have a relationship with our husbands or family.

9:03 Jennifer: There's nothing closer than that unit. And when that unit can't be in harmony, how do you expect the world to be in harmony? You can't even get your family to get in harmony, and you want us to be all peaceful, you have to start with negotiating. You have to start with reasonableness, you have to start with having an opinion about something that you're willing to listen to the other side of it. That's where we miss this. We miss this because your opinion is whatever your political party's opinion is.

9:29 Jennifer: And I personally, this is just me, I tend to think when someone's telling me their political party and the way they are and they believe everything their political party says and agrees with everything their political party does, they're bullshit. They're a follower and they're a sheep. Because you should be able to at least say and to some degree See both sides. See both sides or say, I am lean this way, but I see their point on that, right? I see the point on that. Right. Exactly. Because I agree that we shouldn't have, you know, I'm one, I don't like guns, I don't like anything to do with guns, and I'm willing to say keep AK-47s out of our world.

10:08 Jennifer: We don't need them. Like, I am totally about that. And it kind of goes against what my more political beliefs are. Not that I'm 100% because I'm not. I would be the first person to stand up, sign something, because I would go against what my political, my general political party would think about that. So it's interesting that I don't, I'm not, I'm not either way. Like I can see points on both sides of it. And if you really spend some time listening to people, you get their point of it. I have a very dear best friend who's politically different than me.

10:40 Jennifer: 100%.

10:41 Jackie: Can't need to be open-minded to listen to both sides. Because it is true. I'm the same way as you. I lean both ways. It's just whatever helps me and my family.

10:51 Jennifer: But I mean, you don't have that one one opinion because of one political party, right? They don't just dictate what I think. No, I dictate what I think. So, but I have this friend that she's politically different than me, really politically different than me, and very radical on her side in my in my mind. But the reality is that she feels that way because of this experience she's had and because of the way she was raised in this world. And I have a different view because the way I was raised and the experience I had.

11:17 Jennifer: I totally get it. And when she has come when we have conversations, so sometimes we dive into something and we both stay off of it because we value our friendship more than the political views. And we've been a friend for a very, very long time, and we're not gonna screw that up. And her and I give credit to both of us because we do that. But when we do dive into something and we have a little conversation about something that's happened that day or something, you know, we generally will come to some agreement about how it went.

11:43 Jennifer: And it's like the agreement is somewhere in the middle. It's not necessarily on my side and it's not on the side that she's on, it's at the middle somewhere, and we go, Yeah, I can see that. And then like we have a peaceful conversation, we move on to something else, whatever. But I think when we really talk, we really have a conversation, and we're not just spewing out our political party's rhetoric. We're just actually having a conversation about common sense. We actually don't, we're not that far off.

12:09 Jennifer: Have you ever had that experience, Jackie, where you've known somebody was on the other side, you have more of a peaceful conversation and you walk away and you feel like I see their side on that, and I see my side on that, and I feel like, you know, I could see.

12:21 Jackie: Oh, definitely. I've had both sides of it. Yeah. Definitely both sides. I mean, I mean my me and my brothers, my mother, my parents go the total totally opposite way. Yeah. And so when it's a voting time, we just don't talk. We don't talk about it because that's the way growing up, I do not remember my parents even voting or even talking about politics, you know? Because we were brought up that way. But I honestly don't think they voted back when we were younger. I honestly don't. I do not remember them.

12:48 Jackie: Well, I have to go vote today. No, I was not brought up like that. Now it's like that's all all my mother talks about at times, you know, when it's all going on, it's voting time. And no, she will not see, she will only see one way. That's it. You cannot talk to her, even trying to have a reasonable conversation, trying to do both sides. Okay, but I see your point, but can't you see this? Nope. That's just no, does not happen.

13:12 Jennifer: If you're in the no, if you're in the only can see my side of it and you don't and where did you get that side from? Like some of it is like, yeah, it's like my grandmother. Yeah.

13:22 Jackie: If you sit and listen to the the one way, that's what you're gonna believe because you're not watching listening to the other way.

13:26 Jennifer: Yeah, the algorithms on your phone too. Just I just want to bring this up because I think it's hilarious. The algorithm on your phone will feed you what you stop and watch, right? So if you stop and watch a thing that it's on the side of the political world that you're on, all you'll see from then on are those things on your feet. You don't ever see the other side, right? Because it algorithm says, oh, this person is this way, therefore feed them all that. So you're on your phone and you're thinking, oh, everybody agrees with me because all these people are this, you know, it's always the same story, and it's, you know, it's my side, and then they must agree, and da-da-da.

13:55 Jennifer: Then you get on the the opposite side of that, or you watch the other side of the news or whatever, and you realize the other people have a whole other opinion. You're like, well, no, they they all agree. We all agree that this is the way it should be because it's all on my phone. That's what I'm seeing. Well, that's the algorithm. Them feeding you what you are tend to be interested in. And so you can get really bogged down with the idea that you are amongst the majority of how things think. And you'll find out.

14:23 Jennifer: You'll find out during elections, you'll find out when you go check the other news, you'll find out as people protest, as as things go on, you find out wait a minute, not everybody thinks this, but you can be very convinced of that because of the way the the algorithms and the news and the way you feed your brain the information that you want it to be true will make you feel. So, you know, it's one of those things you got to be careful with because you can get isolated in that.

14:49 Jackie: Right. We were in Idlewild this last weekend with a bunch of friends camping, and they were actually doing the No Kings um protest uh protest. Yeah. Huge. There were so many. And you had people, this one lady with her two little girls like holding up signs. Yeah and um, so we were all talking about as we're going, and then as soon as we like sit down at the restaurant, someone goes, Look at my phone. All of a sudden it had all these things about the no kings, no kings. Right. And they're like just talking about it, going through it.

15:17 Jackie: Yep. Yeah, yeah. And we would just all look at you and you're like, God, that's scary. That's just scary.

15:22 Jennifer: It is scary because people are like, what does that mean? It's because A, they're listening to you through your phones, number one. Number two, you are then being fed the information that will make you feel that way in a strong way, because all of a sudden it's coming at you. And it's all I don't, there's three things I don't trust anymore. I don't trust the media ever, ever. We don't have a bipartisan media anymore, at least in the US. People will say the British BBC, which is the British broadcast channel or whatever, is more in the middle.

15:53 Jennifer: We used to have sort of a middle ground of media, right? We had the one guy who's read the story. That was it. Here's the story. And you didn't have a bunch of people being able to compare their stories on internet and on whatever, trying to, you know, make you feel you had to sit with that and go, okay, I believe it or I don't believe it. You got fed a little bit of information. You get fed a lot of information. Now you can go down rabbit holes, right? There's those people that are conspiracy theorists that think everything is like set up against us.

16:19 Jennifer: And sometimes you're staring at them and they're telling you they're conspiracy theory, and you're like, okay.

16:24 Jackie: Oh, and that was my son, his teacher in sixth grade. And anybody who went to the mountains and their kids um had this teacher, they'll know who exactly who it is. But that was my son for the longest time that, you know, they're listening to us. They're like he threw his phone in the lake. Like he just had all these beliefs that there was a conspiracy about everything. Everything, everything was done for a reason. Oh, because a teacher, so she he would tell the kids this stuff. So then they start thinking about it.

16:50 Jackie: And when you have these kids that think a lot about things, right have downtime that think too much. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

16:55 Jennifer: He threw his phone in the lake for real.

16:57 Jackie: Yeah. Because people they're they're following him.

16:59 Jennifer: That's all like you could seriously get like you could get psychotic. You could have like a psychotic. Yeah. Because you would think now he's allowed to be like, my son did. That's interesting. Yeah, he did.

17:11 Jackie: And actually, he got more into it after after the teacher, but he heard he was fed all this. And we would talk to him about it. Like, I even said one time, I'm like, son, you're not that important. They're not following us. We're not important. You're not that important.

17:24 Jennifer: So freaking true. I don't have any like, oh my god, they're after us. Like, who's the like my son? My son, he's my son's just funny, but he's like, the man. The man is after us. And like, who's the man? Like, yeah, who's the man? Like define stuff the man. And he's like, the man. And you're like, like, is that like the ladies, or is it a man? Like, defined it, you know, like, and you can't get him to define it, but it's just like, I don't know, it's it's very generalizational, but it's funny because they all have sort of a strange, and you want to talk about anxiety, you want to talk about depression, and you want to talk about how people are feeling now.

18:06 Jennifer: Anxiety is worried about the future that you have no control over. Depression is worrying about the past that has already occurred and you're stuck in it. And you're not living in today's world. You are living in a world that has it's coming and you're scared, or it's past and you're depressed by it. Like, I don't know how to get people back to reality today. What has happened has happened. What is will happen will happen. And you have really no control. We literally have not that much control over any of it.

18:32 Jennifer: And if we don't live in today's world, what's happening today, and enjoy what's going on in our world, we've missed all our entire life. You could grow up, you can get to be our age, and you've missed everything because you were so consumed by the past or the future, and you've never lived in a French, you never you never lived today, and you never got to enjoy any of it. And it's gonna be a real bummer for you if you get to our age and feel that way because there's a lot of life to live that is just what's happening today.

19:01 Jennifer: What is happening today in my world? I got up, I had my coffee, I had my toast, I'm sitting here podcasting with my best friend. Later today, I'm going to go see my son, whose wife is getting induced to have a baby. And that is my that's what I happy thought. That's what I have to worry about today. That is what's occurring today, right? And what is happening tomorrow, what is happening the day after, I will get to that tomorrow. I have really learned to compartmentalize my life. Like I run a busy schedule, I have a busy chapel.

19:33 Jennifer: I don't really tomorrow I look at tomorrow. Like today, I look at today. Like I have it organized, I know what's gonna happen. I don't really want to get that far in my life. I if I don't, if I do that, then I miss out what's happening today. And today is gonna be the one of the greatest days of my life. Maybe not today, but tomorrow, but it starts today because my gonna have a grandson. But if I'm not present for today and I'm worried about tomorrow or I'm worried about yesterday, I mean you can imagine how this thing can just you f forget your life.

20:00 Jennifer: So politics is part of that. Politics is worrying about what's gonna happen in the future, and politics is always worrying about what's happened in the past. And it's like all you can do is control what's happening today, and you can miss an entire day of your life, and that turns into years of your life if you don't pull yourself out of just living for what is happening currently. You have no control. We don't have control over any of it. There's not much we can do. Is a what's happening is what's happening, but you know, we'll survive whatever happens to the next years, to the next years.

20:32 Jennifer: People say this is the worst it's ever been. I doubt it. I doubt that's true.

20:36 Jackie: It could get worse, right?

20:37 Jennifer: It could get worse. We could be at war with the entire world. We could be there's a lot of things that could be happening that aren't happening, and we're like, oh, it's gonna happen, it's gonna happen. And it's like 90% of the time, nothing happens. You know, how many times have we heard these things are gonna happen and all this is gonna go down and it never turns into that? It's like just some big scare tactics. You gotta wonder where this politics come from. Is it from our opinions or is it being fed to us?

21:02 Jennifer: Like a little bit of both. Are we being brainwashed to feel a certain way because it helps a party move forward, you know, again?

21:11 Jackie: But it is a sad thing to hear about families these days, yeah. Um, on both sides that don't talk or or friendships.

21:18 Jennifer: Friendships.

21:19 Jackie: I don't think when we're together, we really don't talk about politics as our best friends. Well maybe the husbands kind of talk more about it, you know, no sad, like the husbands bring it up. But we don't. The five of us don't.

21:30 Jennifer: Yeah.

21:31 Jackie: I think because we're right in the right, we're in the now, like you're saying.

21:34 Jennifer: Yeah. What's happening today? Like, who's getting the beer? And, you know, what are we bringing to have fun? And like, you know, I don't want to talk about that shit. It's more like that, don't you think? I don't want to talk about that shit. Like, I hear that shit every day.

21:47 Jackie: I don't want to have to hear about it all day, or if I turn on the news in the morning, exactly.

21:51 Jennifer: It's the worst thing to bring up. Like, how do you get how do we help besties return to something that can be so devastating? All I can tell you is I have a best friend. My other friends, the color differences. We don't talk about it, but we don't always we don't necessarily disagree about a lot of stuff either. When we do talk about it, we give each other I think we give each other grace in all avenues. I can see your side and she can see my side. We come from different different platforms. We had different lives.

22:19 Jennifer: I mean, you can't tell me how to think. I don't think you can do that with anything. You can't tell me to think in religion, you can't tell me to think with politics, and you can't tell me what to think about what to do with my money. All that is personal stuff that really you gotta stay out of, right? Mm-hmm. Yeah, I definitely agree. You can't how would you like it, Jack, if I called you every day and told you what religion you are and now horrible you are if you don't believe in what I believe in?

22:41 Jennifer: We're gonna just take it off politics for a minute, because politics is so charged. Religion's kind of the backstory right now. But how would you like it if I just called you every day and said, What do you believe? Jack, what do you believe? Tell me what you believe. What do you why do you think that? Why do you think that? Why don't you think what I think?

22:53 Jackie: I would stop answering your phone. Uh stop answering the phone when you called and start ghosting you.

22:59 Jennifer: Right. Because if you answered me and then I attacked you for it, because I was like, that's not what I believe. Well, religion is a belief system. It is a belief system, it's a spiritual belief system, it's what guides most of us, it's however you feel. But if I make my stance on you that you have to believe exactly what I believe, if we just take it off politics, this is a reference to politics. If I called you in religion and said, if you don't believe Jackie what I believe, we cannot be friends anymore.

23:25 Jennifer: How that would be sad. It'd be sad, but it would be so ridiculous because your spiritualness is different than my spiritualness. And we they're different, different things. I don't know, maybe in the old ages, they fought about religion. If you don't believe what I believe, then I don't like you. It's the same thing. If you can't take your mind off the politics and get past it, remind yourself that that's what it is. It's like politics are the same thing. You're calling somebody who has a belief system and what their belief system came from, their life and how they experienced it that you didn't experience, and tell them that if they don't believe exactly what you believe, then you can't be friends with them.

24:00 Jennifer: Like it's that ridiculous, don't you think?

24:02 Jackie: I think it's ridiculous. I wouldn't yeah, definitely. I think it's ridiculous. Sorry.

24:08 Jennifer: That's why we're talking about it.

24:09 Jackie: It's a charged thing, but take your mind off of the I mean, if you're a good person, all I care about is if if my friends are good people and they're not hurting people, they're not doing anything, you know, against you know, you're not shooting your neighbor, you're not, you know, getting upset over things. You know what I mean? Just as long as you're a good person and good to me and good to my my family, and that's all I care about. Everything in else you l believe in doesn't matter to me, you know?

24:34 Jennifer: Right. That's right. But we can if you can't take your mind out of politics for a minute, I want you to talk about I want you to go back and I want you to imagine that you call your friend, your best friend, that you know, is your best friend and tell them your religious beliefs and then have them answer you. And if because religion is a hundred ways different. There's one religion, then there's 20 different versions of that religion. Like it's complicated. But if you just hate your person, you could hate somebody because they don't believe what you believe in religion, but then you don't even really have a solid friendship.

25:05 Jennifer: That's not that's just but this is what politics has turned into. And if you can't if you can't agree to agree on politics, try to imagine you try to agree on religion.

25:15 Jackie: Definitely. So sorry, I mean, I got a little bit of a sore throat today, so I'm letting Jen talk a little bit more.

25:21 Jennifer: What do we call that? The Stevie Nicks scratchy voice.

25:25 unknown: Yes.

25:26 Jackie: Should I start singing? I can sing for y'all.

25:29 Jennifer: Anyways, y'all, be kind to each other. Your best friend is your best friend. If you don't agree with politics, just don't talk about it. Just shut your mouth about it because again, you're not if you feed people around you that think only like you and you have no other view on the world, you are also isolated yourself into a pitch hole of you can only be around certain people. And you don't want to be that way. You want to be more, you want to be able to be around more people and have different views on different things and travel and do things and see world from different views.

25:58 Jennifer: And if you're so stuck in it and you've lost your best friend, go get your best friend back and say, look, here's what I would do. If you lost your best friend or repositing because that's what I would do, say, look, I probably came across too strong on this matter now looking back on it, and you are allowed to have your views. I say that what we do is we just don't talk about our views and we go about our lives the way we've always gone about our lives and agree with what we agree with and talk about those things and leave the other stuff to decide that we don't, I don't need to hear all your opinions and you don't need to hear all of my opinions.

26:30 Jennifer: And mutually we agree that we're not gonna give each other our opinions on these things and you know, stay out of politics. If you can stay out of politics and bring a friendship back, then you should do it because you're not going to go find another best friend. And if you find people that just think like you, then you've just turned into one-sided. You're not a two-sided person that can be around different groups of people. You can only be around that side of the the coin. You're very isolated in your world.

26:55 Jennifer: So I think if you've gotten to that and you have lost a friend and you think you can repair it, you have to lay down the you have to bring the white flag and lay down your sword and say, I'm not gonna fight with you about it. I agree that you are allowed to think what you want to think, and I'm allowed to think what I'm gonna think. And if we can agree on that, then we can go forward. What do you think, Jack? Jack?

27:12 Jackie: I agree. You've said a lot there, Jen, and you're perfect. Doing great. Okay, all right. So anyways, let's I do agree.

27:19 Jennifer: Let's go to the bestie rapid questions. Who's more likely to post something controversial and not look back? Maybe me.

27:26 Jackie: Well, yeah, probably you. Because I I have um where I've heard some remarks back on something I've maybe posted, I just I just delete it because I just don't want to hear anybody's remarks.

27:35 Jennifer: Yeah.

27:36 Jackie: You know, if it's anything political or anything like that.

27:39 Jennifer: And I don't really I try not to stay, I was trying to stay out of politics because politics is too charged, but I'm you know, post- Well, not even that I post something that I thought was gonna sound political or religious or anything.

27:48 Jackie: It's just I put it said something or uh re you know, put a uh I re put some something someone else put on, and then I get a remark like, Do you believe in that? And it's just like, seriously, right now? Whatever. Delete. Because it's you know, it turns into something that I didn't even think it was gonna turn into something.

28:04 Jennifer: Yeah, but I'll post something and like I'll tell you that some people come at it and they'll say something, I don't respond. Because I think some of it is just response. Somebody wants to get charged up about it, and you're like, think what you want to think. You post it, you want to put your leave your comment, people could read it. I'm not, I don't need to bite with you about it. That's your opinion. Have your opinion. I don't agree or disagree with you. I'm not gonna say, I'm just gonna leave it.

28:26 Jennifer: And that's your choice. So sometimes I think staff my threads. If you don't agree, I don't go on your threads and talk about the things I disagree with you. I leave it alone. And if you don't like what I post, then and it's not something that's so politically charged that you have to grow grow up and get on your own threads. Talk about what you want to talk about on yours and get offline. You don't need to make a comment here. No, I don't even talk to you and you want to leave a comment. To me, that's kind of like you're just looking for a fight for bitch.

28:55 Jennifer: You don't want to fight with me because I will blow you. Like, I just try to keep my mouth shut about it because I can get mouthy, as you know. So I try to I try to be.

29:06 Jackie: But I think even the males, the males are just as bad, even you know, to the to the females. Not that I'm saying, you know, that they shouldn't because it were females and they're males, whatever. But I find a lot of them are looking for those conversations.

29:18 Jennifer: Yeah, they're looking for a fight. If you're just looking for a fight, go find something else to do. You've got too much time on your hands and you don't have enough going on in your world. You should not have the time to sit around. You should be like, I don't agree with that, move on. I don't agree with that, move on. I do that all day long.

29:34 Jackie: And if you if you've done it to us or one of our friends, I'm sure if you check now, we're probably not friends with you anymore. Just by the way, luck. You wonder why you haven't seen anything from us? That might be why.

29:46 Jennifer: I w I want to tell you a little story, but I don't know if we've told this story, but Jackie and I were in Vegas, and we had a friend who was really good friend with another person that we were there with, and they weren't friends anymore on Facebook, and we kind of kind of got in the middle of it a little bit because I'm still friends with this person, and you know, we know this other person too. So we kind of, you know, kind of got in between made them friends again. We made them friends again.

30:08 Jennifer: We're like, hey, you guys need to be friends. I don't know why you're not friends anymore, but you need to get back on. Like, this is what's going on in their life. Like you, they've got medical issues, like you should talk, and da-da-da. And and we just sort of laid little, what would you call those little hints or little nuggets and just let the other one think about it for a while and then came back and was like, oh because they were both were asking about each other, and it was like we knew you still care about each other.

30:31 Jackie: Yeah. Like you're asking us just because we're kind of the middle people. So we're like, come on, just reach out, reach out here. Here's their number, here's their.

30:39 Jennifer: Yeah. Yep. We did. We brought two people back together over politics. So it can happen. You just have to, you know, get off of your high horse, get down the ground and look at the person and be like, man, we have a lot of history. We've been friends a long time, and that means more to me than my high horse and my politics. So, you know, we did, we did get in the middle of that and we did do that. So good for us, Jackie. Like little peacemakers.

31:03 Jackie: That's right. We're see, we should be ruling the world.

31:08 Jennifer: I'm gonna talk, I'm gonna end this, I'm gonna end this podcast because I have a grand idea and I'm gonna I'm gonna introduce it to this world through this podcast. But let's go on with our Basty Rapid questions. You are next.

31:18 Jackie: Okay, who avoids political convos convos like the plague at Girls Night? Probably me.

31:24 Jennifer: Yeah, probably you.

31:24 Jackie: You speak more. You speak your opinion at all. Yes, you have a lot of opinions. But again, try to be the, you know.

31:32 Jennifer: My opinions are my opinions, but I will listen to other, you know, I can see other people's side of things. I'm not so stringent on it that I that I you won't lean me. I mean, I lean one way. I'm gonna lean that way the rest of my life. That's my prerogative to do so. I've lived a different life and I will stand on that. And just like you, you probably just want everybody to be at peace. You're like, what can I do for you? Can I make you?

31:54 Jackie: We always say, I tried that with my grandmother when she watched the news over and over when I was trying to help with her. And that I'm telling you, I don't you can't change anybody, especially when they're old like that.

32:05 Jennifer: Older you get, the more cemented you are in your belief system. Trust me on that one.

32:08 unknown: Okay.

32:09 Jennifer: Who's more likely to say, can we agree to disagree? I'll do that for sure. I think you do that too.

32:15 Jackie: Yeah, definitely.

32:17 Jennifer: I don't think I need to be right all the time. I can say, I don't agree with that. Well, we don't have to agree, right? Not everybody has to agree with everything. Exactly. So, anyways.

32:27 Jackie: And everybody can tell by our conversations, and then you ask me, and I just say whatever you say, John.

32:32 unknown: Exactly.

32:32 Jennifer: Which is why we get along so well. Right.

32:34 unknown: That's right.

32:36 Jackie: What she said was perfect.

32:38 Jennifer: That's right. I know. I just keep talking. Jen's like, yeah, yeah, that's it. That's it. All right, you're next.

32:44 Jackie: Who definitely get kicked out of Thanksgiving for debating debating the uncle? You. But I don't think your family would kick you out anyways. But no.

32:52 Jennifer: And I don't have an uncle.

32:53 Jackie: There was a situation.

32:54 Jennifer: I don't even have an uncle, so we're good there. I have an uncle, but he doesn't live anywhere near me. But I would be more likely to stand my stance because I don't don't tell me what to do, don't tell me what to think, and don't tell me what my opinions are. Please. You won't you won't I don't tell other people what theirs are, and don't tell me what mine is. That's my belief system. Okay. Who's the one what's the one belief you must align with? What's align with on your bestie? I think that the respect of being friends, like you have to be respect.

33:22 Jennifer: You have to respect me as your best friend, and I have to respect you as my best friend. And we cannot be disrespectful to each other. What is your kind of thoughts on that, Jack?

33:30 Jackie: Whatever our beliefs are, we yeah, we don't disrespect over beliefs or anything like that. Definitely.

33:35 Jennifer: And that you have to be a good person, like you said. We can't be bad people to each other. I can't be a bad person to you, and you can't be a bad person to me. Like, that's not friendship, anyways. That's like some other version. Okay, so well, my final thing, I want to say this about politics. I really, this is my belief system now. I've changed my belief system a little bit for this next this next select election. I want to create the peak party. We have red, we have blue. There's purple out there because that's in between.

34:02 Jennifer: The pink party. It's time. It is time. This world is begging for this. We need two girls, not two boys, two girls. Two girls in the political arena that are going to be strong, independent women who have their own thought systems. One of them, the main one, whatever one, one of them has to be a Republican, a Republican, not a MAGA, but a Republican. And the other one, the vice president or the president, either one, it can go either way, is a Democrat. Why? Because it's time. It's time that we go back to the middle.

34:34 Jennifer: It's time for us girls to show the world it can be done. And we can. Girls can work together. Be like, all right, I'm gonna work on making sure this country is secure and safe and fiscally sound. And I want you to work on the political issues that are abound and that are causing problems in this world that everybody's upset about. You work on that, I'll work on this, and we'll agree, we'll get together and we'll come up with some in between. And we can support each other because if we can do that, we've just changed politics.

35:03 Jennifer: Because politics, people now won't work together because they're so stuck in it, and you can't do it. It's against the law to go talk to somebody who doesn't believe you politically. But if we can do that, if we can bring it into the White House and we could say, us girls are going to work together, because girls can work together better than boys. I think it's time, then we can change this world. And that, my friends, is how you change things. You don't just figure out how to fight with somebody more.

35:29 Jennifer: You come up with a solution that's somewhere in between that makes sense for everybody and gives everybody a place in the world. That's what my suggestion is for this world. We need a pink party. It's time for the girls to come into politics. What do you think, Jack?

35:42 Jackie: Again, I agree with you, Jen. Let's do it.

35:44 Jennifer: And that's my friend's why she's my best friend.

35:48 unknown: Yes.

35:49 Jennifer: All right, pink party. Here we go. If the episode hit you in the feels or made you laugh way too hard, we consider that a win.

35:55 Jackie: And I'm gonna say on this one, it was probably more fills than made you laugh. But anyhow, be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with your writer die.

36:03 Jennifer: And when you're ready to book your make your friendship official, book your bestimony at rhinestoneweddingchapel.com. Because the best love stories don't always come with a ring.

36:27 Song: And no amount of space could ever come between us two. The reuniting's like we never been apart, and every single time we add an iron heart to heart.

36:51 Song: There's not enough words to describe what you all made a make.

37:06 Song: I'll bottom make it last time.

37:40 Song: We write in a toy every day.

38:50 Song: Loyalty.